Part Two...

We were whisked up to the delivery suite only to know that we wouldn't deliver there; our baby was breech and soon enough we'd be in an operating room. We finished up signing papers, most of which read something like "we promise not to sue this hospital if either mother or baby perish". Riiight. Contractions continued during this time and I clearly remember clutching Mike's hand while he dialed my best friend, who then asked to speak to me...I think I got two words out before I couldn't talk anymore and had to hand the phone back to Mike. It was at that point that the nurse came in and wheeled me away and told Mike she'd come get him one "we were set". I so clearly recall being on that operating table and feeling completely surreal and out of place. I wasn't ready for this, and it certainly wasn't how it was supposed to go in my head. I had this all planned out, and so far, none of it had gone according to plan. I started to panic a little when I saw my sweet husband's (calm, but freaked out) face and I managed to calm down a little.

He sat at my head and stroked my hair and I think I told him to talk to me about something...anything, I didn't care. He chose Monty Python. ??? It worked, because it did get my mind off the task at hand...

It took about 20 minutes and I felt this little pop and then there she was, this little teeny (really! only 5 lbs, 11 oz) and Mike and I were unbelievably overcome and overwhelmed. I got to quick her for a very quick second before Mike and the nurse took her to the nursery. I went into the recovery room where 15 minutes or so later Mike appeared at the door and asked me "Would you like to meet your daughter"? That very question terrified the poo out of me, but at the same time, I couldn't say no. I'd never in my life wanted to hold anything more. He brought her to me and there was this amazing, perfectly peaceful little rosebud of a girl wearing a little pink and white knit hat. I believe (and I don't exactly recall because I was out of my mind on painkillers) the first words I said to my little girl went something like "Wow, you're so pretty and I like your hat"!

That day is burned in my memory. There have been many days that will stand out and have stood out since then, but the only other one that even comes close is the one when Aiden was born. It's special for so many reasons other than the obvious ones, but those are deep within my heart and they'll stay right there, but I will end saying this:

This sweet girl is my first born. She is one of the most beautiful creations I've ever laid eyes on and continues to be so. She's special for so many, many reasons, but perhaps she's most special because of one very simple reason: She made me a mother, and she's blessed me beyond explanation.

Happy birthday Ladybug!

Eight years ago...part one...

I was, exactly at this time, sitting on our couch, watching the finale of the first season of Survivor. Mike had duty, and thus would be spending the night onboard the ship, so it was just the tv, the cat, and one very, very pregnant me. Mike called about this time and he was watching the finale as well and asked how I was feeling. I think my response was something like:

"Weird".
"What do you mean, weird"?
"Dunno. Can't explain it. I just feel weird".

I didn't feel sick, or tired, or even achy, just weird, as if I felt this looming feeling that something big was about to happen.

I woke up at 1 am the next morning STARVING. I went downstairs and ate some chips and salsa and happily waddled back to bed (I think it took a solid five minutes for me just to make it up one flight of stairs). I went back to sleep, only to wake up very early (like 7:30-and yes, that's VERY early for me) feeling like poo. I felt like I was getting the flu, or at the very least, a summer cold. I called my mom from bed and told her how I felt and she said, "Call your OB". To which I bristled, because after all, it was just a cold! However, to make my mom feel better, I did call my OB and talked to the nurse:

"I have a cold".
"Ok, describe this cold". (??)
"I feel like I have a fever, my back is killing me and I have a sore throat".
"Hmmm. (pause). Carrie, have you had any contractions"?
(pause....longer pause) "Um...yeah! (and that's me just now realizing that I had) I have! About every eight minutes or so"!
"Ok, you need to come to the hospital. NOW".

I called Mike and of course couldn't get in touch with him, so I asked to speak to a friend of ours who was on the boat with Mike. Here's how THAT conversation went...

"Hi, Jonas, it's Carrie".
"Ohhh...Heeeey...Caaaarie" (in a very laid back manner) "Whaaat's uuuup"?
"Jonas, I need you to find Mike. I think I'm in labor".
"Ohhh...okkk...you're in labor...cooool".
(pause. me--WHAT?)
and then Jonas...
"Wait. Labor. LABOR? HOLY CRAP"!
and hung up on me...

We lived about 20 minutes from the base. Mike was home in about 12 minutes flat. We got in the car, and started driving to the hospital...I think I looked at him at one point and said, "If this isn't IT, I'm really, really sorry..."

Our doctor looked at us at the hospital and said, "Well, we're going to have a birthday today"! That's when I knew...this WAS it...

Bars, Beam, Floor, Vault...

Today, in an attempt to channel Girlfriend's never-ending energy, I scheduled a "try it" class at our local gymnastics gym. (Is that what it is? A gymnastics "gym"? Wouldn't that be redundant)? Anyway...I digress...

I was sure Girlfriend would freak out. In fact, I was so sure she would NOT even ATTEMPT a cartwheel, that I would have placed money on it. I. Was. Wrong.

Baby Girl RAN down the steps to the gym...had more determination on her face then I think I've ever, EVER seen and started stretching...from there she went to work on the uneven bars--she swung and got her legs into some contorted position that actually had her legs then over the bar and swinging...

from there she climbed the rope (I felt kinda funny...like when I used to climb the rope in gym class...sorry, random Wayne's World reference) and she got almost to the top--eight times!

From there it was onto the trampoline, the floor and handstands. I couldn't believe it. I sat there with my mouth open, just sure she would balk at something, but no. NO! She revelled in it. She soaked it up. She LOVED it. My mom called while we were there and when I told her where we were, she went into the Retro Zone, recalling my five years of gymnastics. "You were a natural" she said. Ha. I DID love it, but the balance beam scared the dickens out of me. Are people aware that that thing is FOUR INCHES WIDE? I was honestly scared to death. I can still recall being 8 years old and doing a back handspring on the beam and almost pooing myself because I was so dang scared of missing my footing on the beam. That's all it took for me. I knew that going further in gymnastics meant facing that fear and at the time I wasn't prepared to do that. But enough about me. Come to find out, Devyn's friend Sara is in Gymnastics at the same gym and Devyn would be in her class. We're talking about it...Devyn made a list of pros and cons and then we'll talk to her Daddy about it. I know this much, though. Sweet Girl walked in that gym and it was like she had found her niche. Maybe I'm being naive, but it looked to me like Devyn had found her home...

A p.s. to my Sweetie--Happy Birthday my Love! Here's to a champagne-worthy 34th year. I love you!

Methods of Survival...

I've always said that those involved in a deployment get through it anyway they know how. Some spend insane amounts of money...some journal...some turn to other members of the opposite sex other than their spouse, and even some turn to members of the same sex to, well, yeah, I've known those too. August has been a hard month thus far. We celebrated our ninth anniversary (I spent the day cleaning the house), Mike's birthday is tomorrow and Devyn's is Saturday...my parents were here for two weeks, my granddaddy is not doing well, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. I could honestly yap all day long, but I'm not going to do that. Instead, I try to focus on means of survival. I've always had three: prayer, coffee, and red wine. Good red wine. Life is much too short to 1)not pray, 2) drink bad coffee and 3) drink bad wine. Of course, the kids help me get through, but those are my little joys I look forward to--the coffee and prayer every day, several times a day, the wine about twice a week. I have a new method of survival. I'm even slightly embarrassed to admit this, but I do have a certain level of pride about the whole thing as well. I now, since yesterday, am the proud owner of one kangaroo Webkinz.

So here's how it happened. I started helping Aiden play the games in order to teach him how to do it and I started thinking that the games would actually relax me and take my mind off things. Before long, I was playing the games with no child in sight. To beat that, I started playing all the"daily activities" on their "pets". The kiddles got annoyed. Told me to "get my own". So I did. Now don't go thinking I sleep with it and make little houses for it and what not. It ain't like that. It's just something easy to do in the evening after my brain is goo. I was asked today when I told someone about this new venture, "With all the games on Yahoo, you actually purchased something so you could play your own games and daily activities? On a four year old's website?" Yes. I did. No apologies. Casper and I are very happy together, thank you very much.

You think that's bad? There's still three months to go. Just wait until November...

Alex P. Keaton, circa 2008

Two nights ago, my brother-in-law proposed to his girlfriend and she said yes! I'm not surprised in the least; he is an amazing guy and she is equally so. I'm thrilled that they have found each other and that she makes him so blissfully happy. He has that look on his face (probably permanently) that just sings of complete contentment. So yesterday when he called to talk to The Kiddles, I kind of knew what was up...

Devyn started right in and asked if she could be their flowergirl. She's been doing that for the past three months I think and I've been trying (fruitlessly) to impress upon her that she doesn't just ask for such an honor! Although apparently her boldness worked in her favor because they did ask Girlfriend if she would be so inclined. You know that cartoon where the cat in on the ceiling, hair sticking straight up it's so wired? That was Girlfriend. She was screaming. Then, my brother-in-law asked to speak to Aiden. What follows is an account of how that blessed event went down (keep in mind I'm just hearing one end of the conversation):

Aiden: Ring Bearer? (pause) Ring Bearer? You want me to be your Ring Bearer?
(pause)
Wow! Cool! Yeah, I can do that.
(pause)
Wait. Wait. How much does it pay?
(Brother-in-law: How...How much does it pay?)
Oh, I don't know. I don't like pictures so much.
(pause)
Oookkk. I can do thaaat. Thank you for asking me.

As soon as we hung up, Dude looked at me and said,
"I cannot do this job".
(Me: Why not?)
"Because. I'm not a bear"!
(No, no Sweetie, you don't have to BE a bear or dress UP like one!)
"Well, what do I wear then"?
(You'll wear a tuxedo).
"Ohhhhh NO"!!
(What's wrong? You'll look great!)
"I won't be a bear, but I'll be a penguin"!

So when I told Mike this morning on the phone about Dude's comments, he said, "Oh my gosh. You know who he is right? He's Alex P. Keaton with that 'How much does it pay' remark"! It's actually not a bad idea--both he and Devyn are so darn cute I'm thinking about renting them out for weddings as the Ring Bearer and Flowergirl. It could work!

The Original Lindsay...

Eleven years ago, a dirty, cleat-wearing, adorable athletic chick walked into a dorm room to find a spastic, prissy southern girl lighting up a lightbulb in a microwave. These two girls were introduced to each other and each was thinking, "Oh. My. Lord. This is my soon to be roommate? You've got to be kidding".

Four months later, these two girls moved into their apartment together, not really knowing each other at all. The bonding didn't happen right away, but one afternoon, the adorable athletic chick (no longer dirty) asked the spastic prissy girl if she wanted to go to WalMart with her, so they rode to the only Wal-Mart in town into the adorable girl's Volvo (appropriately named Swedish) and thus began a friendship that the likes of which has not been seen since, and will probably never be seen again.

The adorable girl is my Lindsay. We have been through a POO LOAD of shtuff together and she is and forever will be the closest thing I have to a sister. There are two women in this world I truly consider my "soul mates" and she is one of them (Amber, my lovie, you're the other!).

Lindsay is one of those people who will answer the phone at any time of day and listen to absolutely anything I have to say, gripe about, yell about, yak about or just whine. We have a lot of differences, but she must be my yin and i must be her yang. I really don't understand the yin and yang thing ,but I know that they're opposites ( I think) but that they balance each other ( I think). Either way, we're sometimes very opposite, but we balance each other greatly. She has stood with me at the most important moments of my life:

1. She held my head and hair back the one and only time I got a little drunk (or a LOT drunk) in college when I was praying for my death over the toilet and promising my Lord and Savior I would never drink to that extent again.
2. She celebrated with me during a most intense academic situation my senior year and had chicken nuggets and a frosty with me and my parents the day it was all resolved.
3. She was my Maid of Honor and cried more than I did on my wedding day.
4. She was the first person I called (after our parents) when I found out I was pregnant--I still can hear her VERY acute screams over the phone.
5. She held me and let me cry profusely in the days prior to us moving to London because I was going to miss her so much--and she was the strong one, telling me it would all be ok.
6. She fed a squirrel some Icee off a spoon in Regents Park in London when she came to visit.
7. She survived a looming hurricane with me in Miami and only told me to "Shut your Pollyanna mouth" once when I was being a bit TOO positive about "at least having 42 hours of vacation" as opposed to 4 days. I totally needed to be shut up. Love her for that!

We have been through so much more and she honestly (I think) saved my butt this Spring by doing a most amazing thing for me when she witnessed me at the end of my deployment rope. I will forever be grateful and indebted to her for that. There are just a few things that I look back on my life on when in times of crisis, people have selflessly and unbelivably bailed me out--she did that for me.

Last night was one of those moments at 10pm when I called her about something that was bugging me and in no time she had me laughing and realizing how insane the situation is. She just gets me in every way. I am so very thankful to my Lord for her and what she has brought to my life. She is a gift in every possible way and I hope she knows how much I treasure and love her.

Lindsay. I hereby promise to never buy you a bird as a pet. I promise to never sneak orange flavoring into any food or drink you may consume. I promise to defend your right to think that a cat's tounge is gross (even though you're wrong). I promise to always sit with you however long it takes for you to pick out a Burberry hat. I promise you that you will forever and always be The Original Lindsay and to take our little silly secret stuff to my grave. I promise you that even though we don't get to see each other as often as we like, that you will always be my sister and I will love you til I die and beyond. Youdabest Baby!

Oy...

I'm not jewish, however, I firmly believe in the power of the oy. The kiddles and I spent five lovely (HOT) days in Florida and got back to our lovely home tonight. OH! My ear just popped from the last flight--love that! We spent one day with the Mouse--one day because I honestly think that's all we could stand from the heat. We did get to do the things we missed out on last year including:

1. Stitch's Great Escape
2. Monsters Inc Laugh Floor
3. Aladdin's Flying Carpets
4. Mickey's Philharmagic
5. Cinderella's Golden Carousel
6. Tom Sawyer Island
7. Big Thunder Mountain Railroad
and
8. The Haunted Mansion

Now, it should be noted that The Haunted Mansion is, hands down, my all-time, whoop-it-up, shamalamadingdong, slap your mama favorite theme park attraction. EVER. I love the kitchiness of it and have since I first rode it when I was seven years old. Last year it was closed for refurbishment (funny how something that's "in shambles" needs refurbishment, but I get it) and I missed out on taking my two little sweeties to my most favorite thing at WDW. This year, however, I made SURE it was open. We got off the monorail and made a BEELINE to the back of the park to blissfully find that it only had a ten minute wait! I nearly cried with glee. The Girl and The Boy went in and throughout the ride, Aiden was stonefaced. Not an expression, not a word was muttered from that child. Devyn was a little more vocal, but seemed to be enjoying herself. THE MINUTE we stepped off the ride and into daylight, Aiden had a total meltdown, screaming and crying about what I had just "made him endure" according to him. I will say though, that that special moment I will always remember as one of the worst (but a little humorous) moments of my parental life was when he looked at me and told me, "You've actually ruined my perfect life"! Oh, the humanity...

The rest of the time spent in Florida was spent at the pool at our hotel and one day spent at the Downtown Disney Marketplace, where upon leaving said Marketplace and returning to where our shuttle would be, I realized that our shuttle had LEFT US, an HOUR AND A HALF EARLIER THAN THEY SAID THEY WOULD. Here's what was going on to make THAT moment even better :

50 mile an hour winds
sheets of COLD rain
CRAZY Lightening
CRAZY THUNDER
Black skies
and
HAIL

THANK GOD for my friend Lisa who informed me that the shuttle had abandoned her and her husband too. We managed to hail a cab, but only after my two sweeties were quite literally shivering and trembling and all of us looked like we had just jumped in the Seven Seas Lagoon. And what's better? Her sweet husband paid our cab fare ($40!!!) because in his words "Your husband is fighting for our country. It's the least I can do". Love him!

All in all, it was a good trip. We are beyond tired and spent, but I am so thankful that I have two little good travellers who listened and paid attention to me, and beyond thankful for a husband who supports me doing crazy things like taking two small children to a crazy place by myself. I'll end on a funny note: everytime I've gone to the Magic Kingdom, I've seen some mad crazy stuff. This time was no exception: the first was the man in front of me at the entry gate who had his head shaved into the silhouette of The Mouse several times over, and the other was the dude riding the Teacups wearing a shirt that said "I'm in love with a stripper".

Oy...