Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
~1 Timothy 4:12

Thursday, March 20, 2008

The Woodwork...

Why is it that the moment a deployment begins, the cracks in the woodwork appear in the form of everybody needing something...and everyone does not even remotely involve Mike, the kids, or me? There are definitely times I wish I could go back to that deployment when Devyn was 16 months old and there was no one who needed something, other than her. Those were a blissful 4 months, even though I was sick the entire deployment. Now, the phone rings almost all the time...or an email is received...and I welcome the distraction, but at some level, I just want to scream LEAVE ME ALONE! It's not my business...that I love and would welcome anything dealing with that. It's other stuff...school stuff, science fair stuff (and yeah, that's mandatory--um, hello? she's in second grade), church stuff, and yes, I love doing church stuff, but honestly, I'm just not going to be there every time the door is open. I will be available when my schedule allows it, and if I need to just sit and rest and relax, I'm going to do that. Other things are just going to have to get done when they get done.

What really gets me is the people who expect something who have no clue how a military life, much less a deployment works. I am not available all the time. I have two priorities--Devyn and Aiden. If other things get done along the way,then that's just a bonus. I have 80 billion things to do everyday that just revolve around maintaining our home and children. I honestly just have a lot of things that I'm at the point of not doing that I've volunteered to help for because I can't give what is required. Is that quitting? It may be. And I know that everyone has things that go on every day and that everyone has priorities. I understand that. However, in a lot of cases, I just want to say, "Give me a break". I will do my best and that will have to be good enough. If it's not, then there's nothing I can do.

Ok, vent is officially over. There won't be too much of that. On to less venting, more smiling. :)

1 thing to ponder

Kim said...

(((HUGS))) Carrie, I just can't even imagine everything you're going through. You're in my prayers, sweetie!! You're awesome. :)